Keys To Interpersonal SuccessAuthor: Catherine Pulsifer, ©2012
Many people often ask to know and understand what important keys there are to establish and keep interpersonal success alive and well. These are not secrets or mysteries - they are simple rules to keep in mind as you go through each day and meet people from all walks of life.
Similar Is Not Necessary
One of the first keys is to adapt to every person knowing that each person is there own being and not subject to your own thoughts of how they should and shouldn't act, think or communicate. After all, we are all individuals on this earth and it is the differences that make the world much more interesting and varied. How boring would it be if everyone conformed to what you want or desire. It would be a terribly static world where nothing new or different would ever evolve.
Pay Attention Openly
Another vitally important attribute along the road to wisdom in interpersonal success is to listen well. This means that you pay total attention to those that are speaking to you and not barging into the conversation because you want to insert your opinion. It is not about you when you are a real listener - it is about what the other person is saying. If you do not listen, you are really saying it is more about you than the other person.
Speech Is Only One
The person wants to understand that communication is not just about using the right words. There are also non-verbal aspects to any communication. For example, if you do not look the person in the eyes when you are speaking to them ensures that you really do not want to engage in conversation with them, or if you cross your arms while speaking shows an underlying hostility, or, one of my favorite, if you tent your fingers together conveys a air of arrogance and conceit.
Clear Vision Beyond The Usual
Another important aspect to any level of communication is that of the fear of conflict. To avoid conflict is to avoid an aspect of human emotion that may mean the difference between understanding and ignoring important issues. Not everyone knows how to present his or her passionate ideas in a non-threatening manner so one should be able to accommodate this passion by allowing expression as long as it does not mean any verbal abuse. Through conflict can come growth and understanding of others' needs and desires. It is up to you to see beyond the conflict and find the jewels to clearer thinking and action.
Negative Not. Positive Yes
The last attribute to wisdom in relationships is that of being known as a positive thinker and doer. This does not mean that you never see that a problem is visible; it means that you are more prone to be solution oriented rather than dwell on a problem and cannot see beyond it. One of the best qualities you can work toward is to always put your energy into looking to see what action can be taken to overcome obstacles. With this kind of attitude, you will also see life in a robust way not in a cynical way.
Peter F. Drucker
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