Funny Quotes about Life

Life has its funny moments. Let these funny quotes about life remind you of such times but also you can read between the lines and find the wisdom that they offer.


"I've met a lot of hard-boiled eggs in my life, but you - you're 20 minutes." Jan Sterling
Tolerance     |    


"Try walking forward while looking over your shoulder and see how far you get. The same goes for life. Look forward!"
Martin Henderson, Fatherhood: A Message to Men
Future     |    


"It's funny, I spent the first half of my life desperately trying not to become my mother, and now I am spending the second half of my life desperately hoping to become half the woman that she is."
Helen C. Escott, I Am Funny Like That: A Funny Look At Life
Mother     |    


"Life only delivers to people that create their own postal code."
Jelani Daniel, King of Quotes
Quotes about Taking A Risk     |    


"Eliminating procrastination from our lives is like trying to stop a moving train; it's not easy."
Joseph R. Ferrari, . Still Procrastinating: The No Regrets Guide to Getting It Done
Procrastination     |    


"Chairs were created because someone, somewhere, wanted to solve a big problem: sitting on rocks causes sore bottoms."
Bill Burnett, Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life
Problem     |    


"An old dog can learn new tricks. If your enthusiasm has lost its vitality, do everything possible to revive it."
Don McArt, The Mental Makeover
Enthusiasm   |


"The only time I don't have any problems in this world is when I am already six feet below the ground."
James Jason, Positive Thinking: 365 Daily Positive Affirmations
Challenges   |  


"Watching a person who successfully loses fifty pounds and changes her life is more inspirational than listening to a fitness coach with a perfect body."
Martin Meadows, How to Think Bigger: Aim Higher, Get More Motivated, and Accomplish Big Things
Inspirational Quotes  |  


"When you pray be careful of how you respond to what you get. I read somewhere that if you pray for rain. . . don't complain about the mud!"
Hyacinth Mottley, Words of Wisdom - Words of Faith
Prayer   |  


"Make allowances for your friends' imperfections as readily as you do for your own."
H. Jackson Brown, Jr., Life's Little Instruction Book Volume II
Friend     |    


Do not listen to those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious. Og Mandino
Do not listen to those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious.
Og Mandino
Listening     |    


"A mother is the best friend God ever gave."
Christian Nestell Bovee
God     |    


"To be successful, regardless of the field, one needs to be a participant in the field of battle, rather than a spectator."
Charles Duncan, 5-minute Habits
Success  |  


"Goal setting is similar to travelling from point A to point B within a city. If you clearly understand what the goal is, you will definitely reach the destination because you know its address."
Thomas Abreu, Science of Success
Goals   |  


"He has a heart of gold - only harder."
Adolphe Menjou
Kindness   |  


"For some, life is like a river. It becomes overpowering, uncontrollable and sometimes wild."
Ravindranath Jayaratne, The Power of your Future
Quotes about Life  |  


"The successful know that the road to success is always under construction; they understand the roughness of it and never expected it to be smooth."
Hernert O Nobleman, The Filigree of Success
The Road To Success   |  


"Life is short. Eat dessert first."
Live Each Day |    


"There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Children  |    


"I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book."
Groucho Marx
Books |    


"Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seed that you plant."
Robert Louis Stevenson
Action |    


"You'll be richer in the end than a prince, if you're a friend.
Edgar A. Guest
Wealth |    


"So, if you feel a smile begin, don't leave it undetected, let's start an epidemic quick, and get the world infected!"
Russel H. Conwell
Smiles Are Sunshine  |    


"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
Mark Twain
Birthday  |  


"A man is not paid for having a head and hands, but for using them."
Elbert Hubbard
Work |    


"If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child."
Linda Sunshine
Sister    |    


"Our snooze button does not have the power to delay the sun from rising in the morning. Time simply does not wait for anyone."
Ted Robbins, Time Management: Master Time Management and Boost Your Success
Time    |    


"A turkey never voted for an early Christmas."
Irish Saying
Christmas    |    


"Yesterday, I forgot how a friend hurt my feelings. Today, I forgot what I did to make him mad."
Ariele M. Huff, The Perks of Aging: Blessings, Silver Linings, & Convenient Half-Truths
Age    |    


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