Let this collection of funny quotes
bring a smile to your face, and also we hope you find the wisdom
in them. We all need smiles and laughter in our everyday lives.
"It's funny how we don't like to hear correction as children,
but later on when we begin to experience our own lives;
we will understand the purpose of the training and correction."
Diane Winbush, Reflections of A Father
"Spring is the time of year when it is summer in the sun and
winter in the shade."
Charles Dickens, Great Expectations
Inspirational Quotes |
"Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know
where to go shopping."
"Watch something funny. Laughter is great medicine,
especially for what worries you."
Michelle Stewart, De-Stress Your Life
"A business like an automobile, has to be driven, in order to get results."
"You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water."
"Without a plan of action to put how a dream is envisioned to play out
is like pouring out of picture of
water on the ground and expecting it to stay in on the surface of the ground."
Catherine Pulsifer, Living The Dream
"The Queen of Hearts is, of course, Lucille Ball. Her funniness and
lovability charmed I Love Lucy fans
in the 1950's and still appeals in today's syndicated re-runs."
Susan Horowitz, Queens of Comedy: Lucille Ball, Phyllis Diller, Carol Burnett, Joan Rivers, and the New Generation of Funny Women
Lucille Ball |
"I am not funny. My writers were funny. My direction was funny.
The situations were funny. But I am not funny. I am not funny.
What I am is brave."
"I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one."
"Women are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until
we are in hot water!"
"Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country
are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair."
"If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then,
is an empty desk a sign?"
Top Ten Quotes |
"Never rest on your laurels. Nothing wilts faster than a laurel sat upon."
Mary Kay Ash
Famous Quotes |
"How can they say my life is not a success? Have I not for more than
sixty years gotten enough to eat and escaped being eaten?"
Logan Pearsall Smith
"I am a friend of the workingman, and I would rather be his friend,
than be one."
"Visualize something totally funny or crazy! This will instantly
change how you feel because you can't visualize two things at the same time."
Mark Snyder, Developing Good Habits
"The truth can be funny but it's not funny to cover up the truth."
Ryan Cooper, Difficult People: Ultimate Dealing With Difficult People Guide!
"Cause your facial expression to change - smile."
"Heaven grant us patience with a man in love."
"To keep your marriage brimming with love in the loving cup;
whenever you're wrong, admit it, whenever you're right, shut up."
"From his neck down a man is worth a couple of dollars a day,
from his neck up he is worth anything that his brain can produce."
"If your capacity to acquire has outstripped your capacity to enjoy,
you are on the way to the scrap-heap."
Funny Quotes about Life |
"What happens at Grandma's . . . stays at Grandma's."
"Interest without activity is similar to having a vehicle that is out of gas - it
won't take you anyplace."
Eimantas Gabalis, How To Get Smarter
The Waste You Regret |
"Our minds are like monkeys, swinging from one thought to another
like monkeys on a tree. As a result, we always feel as if a sense of order,
balance, awareness and concentration elude us, because we are always
doing, always acting."
Debeena Harris, Mindfulness: Mindfulness For Beginners
Positive Thinking Quotes |
"See the world like a big wardrobe. Everybody has his own costume.
There is only one that fits you perfectly."
George Harris, Don't Wait For Your Life To Start
"Turning our abilities from stagnate puddles to rushing rivers can
happen when we apply ourselves to the task."
Warren Philip Gates, Success and the Powerful Introvert
"Three groups spend other people's money: children, thieves, politicians.
All three need supervision."
"You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your
arms to full to embrace the present."
"Imagine what we would achieve if we had the spiders' determination?"
Elles Lohuis, The Little Guide to Setting Intentions
"Commitments don't have to be chains.
They can be rich with meaning. They can be the wings on which
our spirits soar."
Marilyn Mason, Ph. D., Seven Mountains, Life Lessons from a Climber's Journal
"Live like you golf. Don't forget to follow through."
"Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him."
"Some people seem to go through life standing at the complaint counter."
Fred Propp Jr
"Don't let anyone become a vacuum and suck the
happiness out of you - pull the plug."
"At times I was arrogant and other times I had the lowest self-esteem
ever. It is a funny thing to have to remind yourself pride comes
before the fall and then other times have to remind yourself
you are God's masterpiece."
Mandy Fender, Beautifully Broken: Giving God the Broken Pieces
"When you choose relationships, look for people with a sense of humor.
If you are around others who are funny and lighthearted,
you are more likely to find yourself relaxed and enjoying a good laugh."
Ace McCloud, Forgiveness: The Healing Power Of Forgiveness
"A funny thing happens when we start keeping promises to
ourselves - we become unstoppable."
Ken Fite, The Dash: Lessons in Life, Faith, and Purpose
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why
the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
Laurence J. Peter
"Instead of buying new cards each year, reuse old Christmas cards
that you have been given. Get creative and funny, cross out the old
sections of handwriting and add your own."
Henry Owen, How to Have a Green Christmas
"Remember that sometimes people laugh when something is actually
funny, but often they laugh when they lack the imagination to understand
John Barrett, SoS-Life Enhancement
"One of the most successful ways companies get the consumer's attention
is by presenting the product in a funny or emotional way."
Arlene Battishill, Retail Shock Therapy
"Humor oils the wheels of life and helps to keep it running smoothly."
Dorothea Kopplin, Something to Live By
"Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction
listen to weather forecasts and economists?"
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