Funny Quotes 83 to 121

Funny Quotes 83 to 121

  1. “If you reach for a star, you might not get one. But you won’t come up with a hand full of mud either.” Leo Burnett
    Quote of the Day
  2. “You only need listen to yourselves. It reminds me of an old proverb:
    ‘If and When were planted, and Nothing grew’.” Catherine Pulsifer, If and When Were Planted
    Listening   | 
  3. “Trouble knocked on the door, but hearing laughter, hurried away.” Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
    Laughter   | 
  4. We humans are a silly bunch. We spend half our time trying to fit in with the crowd and the other half trying to stand out from it. Nick Vujicic
    Funny Poems   |  
  5. Like almost everyone who uses e-mail, I receive a ton of spam every day. Much of it offers to help me get out of debt or get rich quick. It would be funny if it weren’t so irritating. Bill Gates
    Daily Motivation   |  
  6. I smile because you’re my sister in law, I laugh because you married my brother. Author Unknown
    Happy Birthday Sister In Law   |  
  7. You can’t shine like a diamond, if you not willing to get cut like a diamond! Eric Thomas
    Encouraging
  8. “Life is the movie you see through your own eyes. It makes little difference what’s happening out there. It’s how you take it that counts.” Denis Waitley
    Quotes about Life   | 
  9. If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how 
amazing you can be. Maya Angelou

  10. If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be. Maya Angelou
    Words of Encouragement   | 
  11. “You don’t get paid for the hour. You get paid for the value you bring to the hour.” Jim Rohn
    Work   | 
  12. “I truly believe we are all funny . . . at least some of the time. Some of us are termed naturally funny and others have to work at it. We all have moments in life that make us laugh.” David Nihill, Do You Talk Funny?
    Inspirational Quotes
  13. If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. Bendan Behan
    Irish Quotes and Sayings
  14. “Cleaning your house while your children are home is a lot like brushing your teeth with Oreos in your mouth.” Author Unknown
    Children   | 
  15. “Some people die at twenty-five and aren’t buried until they are seventy-five.” Benjamin Franklin
    Death   | 
  16. “I wonder if we are given kids to teach or to learn from?” Author Unknown, Big Mud Puddles and Sunny Yellow Dandelions
    Teacher   |    
  17. “What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
    Positive   | 
  18. “Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.” Mark Twain
    Smile
  19. “A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks.” Charles Gordy
    Change   | 
  20. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” Zig Ziglar
    Motivational   |    
  21. If you dig a grave for others you may fall into it yourself. Irish Proverbs
    Proverbs   | 
  22. A man who correctly guesses a woman’s age may be smart, but he’s not very bright. Lucille Ball
    Smart   | 
  23. “You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” Walt Disney
    Funny Quotes about Life   | 
  24. “We have a problem. ‘Congratulations.’ But it’s a tough problem. “Then double congratulations.” W. Clement Stone
    Daily Inspiration   | 
  25. “A smile confuses an approaching frown.” Author Unknown
    Smile Poem   | 
  26. ” . . . I ask people if an elephant has ever bitten them. Most of the time people say no. But everyone has been bitten by a mosquito. It’s the little things that get us.” David DeNotaris
    Make A Difference   | 
  27. The Wright brothers flew right through the smoke screen of impossibility. Charles Kettering
    Graduation  |   
  28. You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom. Proverb
    Funny Proverbs  |   
  29. Can I give you a handful of laughter, a smidgen of giggles to boot,
    a cupful of tease and a comical sneeze, followed by a hilarious hoot.
    John McLeod, A Handful of Laughter
    Smile Poem  |   
  30. You need to be comfortable with you. Stop worrying about the couple in the corner who may or may not be looking at you funny. Willow Cross, Getting Over It
    Being Yourself  |   
  31. “A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.” Irish Saying
    Motivational  |   
  32. It’s always too early to quit. Norman Vincent Peale
    Never Quit  |   
  33. On speech making: Be sincere; be brief; be seated. Franklin Roosevelt
    Communication   | 
  34. You can overcome anything if you don’t bellyache. Bernard M. Baruch
    Overcoming   | 
  35. No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet. Author Unknown
    Grandmother   | 
  36. Common sense is very uncommon. Horace Greeley
    Common Sense   | 
  37. Beware of little expenses. A small leak will sink a great ship. Benjamin Franklin
    Famous   | 
  38. Procrastination is like stopping a train that left the station: when we procrastinate, we hold others up. Joseph R. Ferrari, Still Procrastinating
    Procrastination   | 
  39. If you are around others who are funny and lighthearted, you are more likely to find yourself relaxed and enjoying a good laugh. Ace McCloud, Forgiveness
    Relax   | 
  40. The presence of God in the flood is better than a ferry boat. Charles H. Spurgeon
    Quotes about God   | 

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