Self-Confidence: Believe In YourselfAuthor: Byron Pulsifer © 2007
"When a man has put a limit on what he will do, he has put a limit on what he can do."
Charles M. Schwab
As a child, we are not limited by preconceptions. Children attempt to do what they want without being burdened by the concept of failure.
Have you ever asked a child, a young child of one-year old whether they want to learn to walk knowing that they will fall many, many times in the process? Have you asked a child if they want to learn to ride armed with the knowledge that they'll probably fall at some point and may scrape their elbow or knees? The answer to both questions will probably be a decided no.
Adults tend to suppress their imagination, and are too quick to give up their dreams. What does it look like to give up on your dreams? For some people, what was once a burning desire has not become the burnt out embers of an old fire. For these people, their dream never got beyond a thought, an idea or a notion of things that could be. Instead, the dream died for several reasons.
One of these reasons that a person's dream may have died is from lack of knowledge in how to establish a working goal, that is, what the end result should look like or feel like. But, this particular issue can be easily overcome given that there is a multitude of goal setting books and articles available at local libraries or on the Internet. Nonetheless, the main ingredient to move forward may not be the lack of knowledge but more a lack of dedication, perseverance and motivation. For some, the outward expression of their dream may have fallen on the wrong ears. What does this mean?
It means that a verbal expression of one's dream or dreams may have been told to a person who has absolutely no interest in the other person's dreams. For them, the dream was simply a pie in the sky verbalization of something that could never happen. For these types of people, a dream expressed to them is only a mirrored expression of their own failure to live their own dream. This may mean that they believe that if they couldn't bring their dream to life, or they were incapable of doing so, what reason could there be for someone else's dream to become a reality.
Many a dream has been unceremoniously dashed to the garbage because of someone else's view of the other person's lack of ability or intelligence. What so often is overlooked or overstated is the brilliance of establishing a dream by the common man; the man without reputation, or born into a certain family, or a person who has attended a certain university.
You can find and read many, many real life stories of famous people around the world who did not finish or even attend schools of higher education. Likewise, the fact that you may have a number of degrees behind your name doesn't mean that any dreams you have will be guaranteed to end in results. Neither lack of education nor more education determines the level of success as it applies to the implementation of a plan that puts a dream's outcome into action.
Let's assume, for the moment, that you once possessed a dream, a exciting dream but a dream left smoldering without renewed fire. What can be done to rekindle the fires of dreams of yesterday?
Part of the answer to rekindle fires of yesterday is to rekindle your imagination. Rekindling can be accomplished, in part, by associated with other people who respect you and strive to build your confidence. In short, it is the value of relationships that can help or hinder you. If your current associations only put you down, you'll need to find one's that are just the opposite. Extend your network of who you know by asking a respected individual in your particular field of endeavour (you need not personally have to know them). I have found, in my own case, that generally speaking people who have succeeded will be more than willing to help you directly, or, at the very least, will be happy to direct you to people they know who will be able to assist you.
Don't let the child in you disappear - imagine, dream, and believe in yourself. With determination and belief, you will be surprised at what you accomplish.
"When you develop yourself to the point where your belief in yourself is so strong that you know you can accomplish anything you put your mind to, your future will be unlimited."
Imagine what you could accomplish if there was no such thing as failure. Have you ever met someone who succeeds no matter what they attempt? These people use their imagination; they don't let failure stop them. They keep moving forward learning as they go, full of determination on their way to reach success. But, what you see as success at every turn is really only a fallacy. You see, each of these success stories didn't result because they had the magic touch or were gifted to succeed. What you do not see are those times when they failed.
However, failure wasn't the end of the story but only the beginning. Each failure was used as a catalyst to augment future endeavours. Why? Because these individuals analyzed aspects of strategies that didn't prove to be successful but kept those aspects or strategies that worked and thus gave them new beginnings brewed with the leaves of a little success. It isn't therefore, that these individuals had the "success touch" but rather that they had the mindset of success. The mindset of success means that these types of people see forward not backward; they see solutions not problems; and, they see opportunities not roadblocks.
"An invincible determination can accomplish almost anything and in this lies the great distinction between great men and little men."
Dr. Thomas Fuller
Your accomplishments will give you satisfaction and enhance your self-confidence. Now, let's unpack the previous statement carefully. The first thing to point out is that concerning accomplishments. The element that is important here is that you'll notice that the word accomplishment is plural and not singular. Why is this noteworthy?
The mistake many people make is that they believe that it is necessary or required that one accomplish something that is big, or important or visible to those around them. This attitude is the wrong way to think if you want to grow properly. This means, instead, that each and every accomplishment no matter how small is another step forward. Each step that you take that is successful gives you the inner fuel to feel confident to take the next step. Again, the next step does not have to be huge in nature; it simply has to be another small achievement of a goal. Each goal attained, in turn, provides the element of accomplishment which gives you the self-confidence to take another bigger step.
Self-confidence is built not through huge achievements but through achievements that carry you on to the next , and the next, and the next. It is with this internalization of self-confidence that propels you through obstacles or problems knowing that with each attempt lessons are learned that help lead you to your ultimate goal.
"There is no man living who isn't capable of doing more than he thinks he can do."
A person with a strong sense of self-confidence is happier with their life because they believe in themselves! And, with this strong deep rooted belief in yourself, you will also be able to give to other people who need your encouragement to move forward in their own lives; these people can benefit from understanding and knowing how you got to be so self-confident.
Inspirational Quotes for Reflection:
"Failures are made only by those who fail to dare, not by those who dare to fail." Lester B. Pearson
"Intrinsic motivation comes from within you and is powered by your own dreams, aspirations, wants and wishes." Joanna Jast
"Great things are accomplished by talented people who believe they will accomplish them." Warren G. Bennis
Read more Inspirational Thoughts
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