Author: Byron Pulsifer, ©2017
How to stop worrying is a never ending quest for millions of people. The aspect of worrying throughout the day also haunts thousands upon thousands. How do you stop or control these negative thought?
As talked about below, there are several examples of how to worry less and enjoy life more. But, before we talk about worrying less, let’s spend a few moments and talk about how worrying can help.
The Positive Aspects Of Worrying
As I mentioned above, it is best to first talk about all the positives there are about worrying. I want to list them here so that we can get them out of the way and focus, instead, on how to stop worrying in the rest of the article. So, here are all the benefits of worrying: none; nothing; notta one.
Now that we have listed all the positives, of which there are absolutely none, we can spend the rest of the time on how to stop worrying by adopting one or more of several strategies.
Stop Worrying By Not Procrastinating
One of the fallacies is that putting off doing something somehow relieves stress because you do not have to face whatever it is that needs to be done. For example, do you think that putting off studying for a test makes it easier on you because you can relax longer? Not likely as you know oh so well. What leaving something to the last minute does instead is to highlight the fact, in both your subconscious and conscience mind, you are increasing your stress levels by your failure to take action.
Make sure you act when you have to and do not put off until tomorrow, or next week what has to be done. Procrastination is a way to keep an issue in the forefront of your mind so it can’t simmer away and cause worry. Don’t be one of those people who say, if only someday I had more time. Get it done right now.
Stop Worrying By Find The Opportunity
A lot of times, we visual or view a situation that causes us the real problem. However, if you turn it around and see a problem as a mere challenge, you will also see that there is an opportunity right before your eyes. Sometimes, the fact that a challenge comes to your mind also means that you know that you can overcome it or utilize skills that you already possess to meet this challenge head on.
Stop Worrying By Refraining From Talking About It
Have you ever noticed that each time you talk about a problem with some else they seem to also start talking about their problems. With one problem comes another voiced problem until your conversation is filled with all negative tones rather than the other person trying to help you overcome the problem you started out talking about? The old adage is alive and well and that says basically that misery loves company.
The idea is not to solicit others into your misery camp but, instead, your motive should be to ask for help in resolving whatever issue it is you are concerned about.
Quit telling everyone who will listen about your problems or issues. When they acknowledge these issues, it only serves to add fuel to the fire and keeps you mired in staying stuck and not moving beyond them.
The Key To Stop Worrying
Before I tell you the key to stop worrying, let me just state that I have used this same key over and over again in my own life. It is the key to overcome obstacles and eliminate or reduce any vestiges of worry that once dominated my thoughts.
The key, and I would say the vital key, to overcome worry is to take action and you can’t take action if you sit around and mope about it or waste valuable time that could be dedicated to resolving whatever is bothering you.
To Help Along The Way
One of the great contributors to worry is to always feel rushed to do either this or that. Make sure you get yourself organized, develop a schedule that gives you the time you need and do not try and do everything at once. Otherwise, you’ll end up worrying that you have to get it all done at once.
Size Does Not Mean A Problem
Do not worry about the size of a project. Think of a large project as doing the dishes, that is, one dish at a time gets it done. The same applies to a large project when you divide it up into little pieces, manageable pieces, where you can do a little at a time. A little at a time turns out to be a whole bunch over time.
Use Your Energy Wisely
A lot of energy and worry is devoted to those things you have no control over. If you cannot control it, or do anything about it, forget it. You only have so much time in every day so do not start to worry about thinking about issues that do not deserve any of those available hours. Wasted thinking is wasted time.
If you have taken action to resolve an issue that has been on your mind, be done with it once the action is taken. The action has been taken so there is no use in worrying about the outcome. You have other things that require your attention and time. Understand that your best effort means that this is all the time and effort you are going to expend. You’ve committed and used your energy and time and now it is best to let it go. No amount of worry can grow one additional hair on your head neither can any amount of worry accomplish the tiniest of things.
A case in point recently involved my mother-in-law who was preparing to get her house ready to sell so that she would have enough money to move into a senior’s independent living environment. From the get go, she started to worry. She worried about whether anyone would buy her house; she worried about how much money she would get for her house when it did sell; she worried that she wouldn’t have enough money to last for the rest of her life even though she had built up quite a nest egg with the right investments over the last twenty years; she worried that she would not be able to take all her possessions with her even though she didn’t use half of them or need them.
With the exception of only a few things, she had absolutely no control over the situation nor could she even think of any solution because there wasn’t a solution that she could initiate that would control something uncontrollable. The only way we helped her move through her situation was to guide her into actions that she could start to take on her own, and actions that would reduce concerns. For example, she was encouraged to start going through all of her clothes and weeding out what she did not wear and what she really needed. She also started to clean out her cupboards and closets and throwing away all sorts of things, mostly just junk, that she had been collecting over the years. The best part of her action was that she was exercising control over what she could. Action that one can take always triumphs over worrying.
Inspirational Quotes for Reflection:
“The only thing that really works is the admission that we are powerless over our worrying and there is a power greater than ourselves to whom we can give it.” Anne Wilson Schaef
“Whatever the problem we have in our life, someone has faced it and overcome it. ” David DeNotaris
“Sometimes you need to stop waiting, stop procrastinating, and go get what you want out of life. Stop being fearful and worrisome; no problems are as hard as we sometimes make them out to be.” Julius Williams
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