There is much written about positive mental
However, very little is said about one's own development of nurturing
a self-designed positive attitude.
Let's explore how you might design your own without having
to attend any motivational training sessions.
Positive Versus Negative Thoughts
It has been said that every person generates thousands of negative
thoughts per day. Unfortunately, a large proportion of these thoughts
are thoughts are unpleasant, stressful, self-sabotaging or slef-defeating.
Over the course of many years, I have found many things including
sorrow, distaste, disgust, dislike and distrust.
A lot of these negative thoughts appear to either focus
the mind on things that went wrong or were distasteful in the past or
concentrate on things that may harm or negatively affect one in the future.
Past thoughts of actions, behaviors or events are long gone but the
mind can recall them for many reasons. Sometimes, it is because
some of the past events were never adequately dealt with or resolved.
Correspondingly, future concerns are simply manifestations of unformed
events that have never taken place and are only negative perceptions.
Nevertheless, either one or both spring into the conscious level with
little or no conscious coaching.
Dislike The Dislikes And Create The New
Take dislike for example. Many years ago, I was probably guilty of very
strong dislikes for some people. After all, being human is always
a quest to overcome certain prejudices or less than comfortable feelings.
The thing that I learned over time was the negative aspects of letting
strong dislikes rule one's vision. What I found was that by turning
away from strong dislikes to viewing each person as unique was
one certain method to avoid negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
I know what you may be thinking; easier said than done, right?
The process of altering one's mental thoughts is not done haphazardly
or only now and again. It is an active conscious thought that first
of all identifies a negative thought when it occurs, and, then, actively
the thought to a more positive one.
For example, let's say that you are driving your car down a busy
highway and you are cut off by another driver who doesn't seem
to notice or who doesn't care. Your first thought, I'm sure, is one
of anger or outrage that you were cut off by a dangerous driver or,
at the very least, a negligent driver.
Here is an opportunity
to put into practice the process of turning a negative to a positive
and there are definite advantages. First of all, consciously change
your negative thought about being cut off by reframing your thought
to one that gives thanks for not be in a devastating accident.
Secondly, forgive the other driver because unless you don't,
you'll give the anomymous driver power over you the rest of the day.
I know this last point sounds a little odd but here's why it's important.
If you do not forgive
and forget what the other driver did, you keep the thought of being
wronged possess your conscious mind. The other driver, in the mean time,
has merrily gone on their way without a care in the world. You, instead,
keep thinking about the incident that recalls the negative emotion all over
again. The main point here is to not give control over your emotions to
I have also found that love, passion and happiness
from within than out. That is to say each one of us is responsible for
our own happiness - you cannot give your responsibility for love
or happiness to some one else expecting that it is there duty or place
in life to make one happy. Happiness is more a state of mind,
knowing oneself in being open and honest with what is real,
what is necessary, what we think and believe and to sort our own issues out.
A Great Attribute
One of the greatest attributes one can develop is to be able to share
your happiness and good feelings with others for several reasons.
The first reason is that most people like to be around people who
are positive, that are happy
and that can bring a smile to your face.
This is obviously opposed to those who are always negative,
who see the world as a set of troubles, which see everything
that is bad but never seem to be satisfied or happy, or even happy
for others who have done well.
Why Be Positive
So, why be positive at all when it is much easier to frown at all parts
of life that do not go your way?
Being a pessimist, or a negative person or even a procrastinator
are all attitudes towards life and all that it involves. With every negative
emotion comes more pessimistic behavior. And with more pessimistic
behaviors comes even more negativity basically because one feeds
the other. You are a person now who is in a very severe downward spiral.
The lower you go the bottom becomes even darker with little light shiny
On the other hand, the more you can envisage life
as a series of little hurdles,
the more you will start to devise plans, behaviors and insights into how
to more easily overcome any issue. The more often you develop strategies
to jump over or through hurdles, the easier it becomes to take on and beat
the next one. There is no doubt in my mind at all that learning to handle
all of life's little problems and issues is the only way to develop a stress
free life, a life of seeing light before dark, and a life that lends itself to help
others learn the same secret.
Did I Say Secret?
I did. The reason I said this is simple. Everyone looks for a secret;
a way to get and obtain a life that is more enjoyable and less sorrow,
problems and pain and a positive mental attitude contributes to the
abundance of life. Well, the secret is you; your attitude,
your thinking, your ability, and in your control.
Far too many people seem to rely on the feelings and emotions
of others to give them their clue as to how to act or behave.
This acceptance of what others do and how they think is the most
debilitating attribute you could possibly adopt. If you adopt this
approach to gain your identity, you'll basically have no identity at all.
This means that if you are to choose
how you behave or act or
think, you must exercise your attitudes without hesitation.
Your Life Under Your Control
It is your life to create as you see fit and it is no one else's responsibility
to do so. Remember this as well; everything you do, how you act and react,
what and how you think is what you'll be held accountable
for. You will be judged as if your visual signs of expression
are unique to you so you might as well take the reins and direct your own life.
This is a great secret that is now in your possession to do with it as you wish.
You can find excuses for anything, or you can find solutions
and work towards them, which in the end will bring happiness.
There are many ways to become a much better person and there
are many ways to stay in a place without kindness or happiness,
or caring. What kind of person do you really want to be?