Most of us think that we are fine human beings
and, for the most part this is true. But, maybe we should sit back for a
few minutes and look deeply into our own inner spaces. Think about how
a normal day progresses for you from the time you wake up to the time
when you go to sleep.
Think About This
Here are some behaviors,
and thoughts to reflect on as you sit quietly:
1) As you arrive at your place of
work, do you
warmly and genuinely greet colleagues, or are you to wrapped up in your
own world that you ignore them? Are you the first person to say, "Good Morning."
As the day progresses are you the one who is upbeat and enthusiastic about
the tasks that must be done, or, are you the one who is first to complain.
2) Do you normally smile at everyone you meet during your day,
or do you wait for others to smile first, or, are you prone to frown? Even when
you pick up the phone - are you smiling or are you frowning - they say people
can hear a smile in your voice.
3) Are you known as an open and receptive person who welcomes others
ideas or opinions, or do you have a tendency to immediately discount
other people's opinions when they do not match your own thinking? When
someone suggests something do you find yourself thinking of ways to make
the suggestion work or are you quick to shot the idea down.
4) Does your usual behavior include praising others for their work,
or their contributions, or are you apt to criticize first by finding fault?
Do you offer words of encouragement
to others; recognizing that this can attribute to a person's success. When people are frustrated or overwhelm do
you help them and offer them words to support them. Are you more worried
about what the boss will think rather than what your co-worker will think.
5) Are you able to appreciate
that everyone has feelings no matter who they are or where they fit into
the social fabric of society, or do you shun or avoid some people because
they do not fit within your social circle? Do you have empathy for customer complaints,
do you try and put yourself in their shoes or are you rolling your eyes on the phone
thinking I am to busy to listen to this.
6) You may be a busy person but do you volunteer or
outside of your work, or do you prefer to let others give of their
time and energy
to assist others in need? Do you feel a business should be involved in the
community they are working in or do you feel that is someone else's
responsibility. Do you demonstrate that you are a person of
generosity, one who shares and cares.
7) Are you really interested in other people and who they are and
what they are like, or are you more likely to speak or associate only
with people that feed your ego? Do you treat people differently depending
on what position they hold. Or, do you see the potential in everyone.
8) Are you known as a friendly person whom is easy to speak with,
or are you known as the type of person who is difficult to approach or is
full of themselves, rude, or arrogant? Do people come to you for advice and
suggestions? Do you rush your answers or are you thoughtful and patient with
9) Do you follow through on your commitments.
When you say you will do
something you do it. Or, do you easily find excuses or look for reasons
why something is not done. Do people know that they can depend on you.
10) Do you motivate or do you de-motivate? After talking with you do
people take action, do they seem to have a new-found desire to accomplish
or resolve the issue they talk to you.
There Are More Qualities That Can Be Listed But I think you get the main point. You may not feel you possess any of the negative aspects spoken of but others may see you in a different light. This happen to me when I was in a leadership role, I thought I was a positive fair leader, one who encouraged, and listened to others opinions. My team and I attended a motivational session and one of the exercises that we did was rating the leader. As the leader I had to answer a bunch of questions by evaluating how I saw myself interacting with the team. And, then each member of the team were presented with the exact same questions and they evaluated how they saw me as a leader.
The results were pretty good, but there were a couple of questions where how I saw myself and how my team saw me were entirely different. I was shocked. But we had a good discussion on the differences and it helped me grow as a leader, and it helped my team grow also. My point in telling you this is if you ever have a chance to evaluate yourself and then have a team member evaluate you with the same questions you may find some differences between what you think and how you are actually seen. You can then readjust the way you present things or the way you do things.
This is also a helpful tool to use in relationships. As we all have ways about us which we think are fine but in fact the way we are being perceived is the total opposite to what we are thinking.
how you are coming across is not your intention.
The Main Thing To Consider Is How you want to be known as the years roll by. It is comforting to
know as your life
winds to an end that you have been a wholesome, valuable, encouraging, giving, caring,
and influential person to those you meet along life's pathway.
Make a list of the qualities that you admire in other people. This will assist you
when you think about the qualities you would like in yourself. Assess
yourself, ask yourself how you demonstrate these behaviors, and write down
examples for each one. Then ask someone close to you to assess the
qualities you wish to have - do they see them in you. Again make sure
they give you examples of how they see you. This can prove to be a
valuable exercise to help you grow and learn.
"Rejoice while you are alive; enjoy the day; live life to the fullest; make the
most of what you have. It is later than you think."
"A lot of the time your employees will have ways that they go above and beyond for you that you may not notice, and so giving them the chance that you are observant their sacrifices and the ways that they do things for you that are out of their way is a great way to continue keeping them motivated to excel."
"I believe in hard work, but it is even more important that we work with the right attitude."
"Any of us who have ever been thirsty for encouragement should appreciate the value in offering uplifting words to the people in our lives. Sometimes a person just needs a little inspiration or a different thought to get them propelled in the right direction."
"You have to have a passion for your work. How can we expect people to be passionate if you, as their coach, does not have a passion? Coaching has to be something that gives you passion and energy."
Byron and Catherine Pulsifer
"We cannot build our own future without helping others to build theirs."