Today was a day of reflection. It wasn't that I had planned such a day but it was inevitable after my wife and I received a call yesterday from a good friend who told us that his wife had just passed away a few hours before he called. This morning, we learned that he was holding a small family and friend's visitation at a local funeral home and we were invited.
There was no doubt whatsoever that we would go, in fact, we wanted to go not only to pay our last respects to his wonderful wife, but also to support our friend. As we drove towards the funeral home, a good forty minutes from our home, many thoughts and memories flooded our minds.
I remember vividly, the first time we met him. It was a warm summer afternoon at a local craft show where we were displaying our own products. It wasn't long after our initial meeting that we became very close where our commonality from our shared glass crafts brought forward to become very good friends. And, it was from this friendship that we first met his wife.
She was a woman who didn't hold to false pretenses, a woman who gave freely of her warmth, a woman who extended her own personality to be inviting and gracious.
Their home together was a growing reflection of what they both wanted having started with a house that needed a lot of tender loving care. A house that became a home, a lovely home where flowers adorned her garden painstakingly planted with his help. There was talk of what they would do next, what they would do upon her retirement which was only a few years away. There was always a strong sense of partnership and love.
Life's Ups and Downs
Life is never fair but for all its ups and downs, we were privileged to have shared what time we knew her if only for a few short years. And, it wasn't as if she had been ill for some time, or had any signs of ill health other than a terrible flu. If she had been ill for a long time, we may have been able to steel our minds in preparation for her passing that is if anyone can be really prepared for someone's inevitable death. But, this was so sudden - no warning signs of impending danger and death. We will not forget her - she is forever captured in our hearts and our fond memories.
Life brings so much yet takes it away so suddenly. And, at the time of death what we are left with is shared friendship and memories. Our friend is hurting, in pain, and traveling along the road of despair and grief. But old friend, never feel that we will not gladly walk with you through these difficult times. We offer our comfort, our unspoken support, our ears, our hearts, and our strength. You will not be alone.
There are several people who reflect on their life throughout a lifetime and one of these reflections is that done by those simple glances in the mirror and decides whether what you seem to be or what you want to be is real or simply a picture reflecting back to you that you do not recognize. Thus was the case of this friend who lost his wife recently.
He told me that he looked in the mirror and did not like what he saw. He had become a saddened shape of what was once full of vitality and purpose. He knew that he was troubled and that he needed help. The good news is that he sought help before he slipped further and further down a hill that would present a terribly difficult climb back up.
It Happens To Us All
Every person goes through terrible loss in life and sometimes that loss must be shared over and over gain with other good friends, and even others must seek help to be able to carry on. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this and everything right to do it now and not slip away to become what you do not want to be.
Inspirational Quotes for Reflection:
"Death - especially when unexpected - has a way of wiping away the filters we've put on our lives and giving us a new perspective about where we are and where we may be headed."
A C Aseh
"You must allow yourself to grieve your loss. What does that mean? To us, it means allowing yourself to feel those emotions, no matter how intense they may be."
"True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island. . . to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing."