"Focus on fixing the problem, never focus on the blame.
Problems are only resolved when solutions are sought."
"You become a Victim when you blame yourself or others for some
problem or error."
Jay Fiset, Reframe Your Blame, How to Be Personally Accountable
"When we assign blame we are pointing the finger to who or what
is responsible for a fault or for a wrong doing. We are trying to make others
accountable. Blaming does
not solve a problem it usually only makes people defensive."
Blame is the demonstrated lack of self-respect choosing to deposit
one's negative actions onto others to reinforce one's view of being of
good, fair, and approved.
Byron R. Pulsifer
Stop the blame game. Stop! Stop looking out the window and look in the mirror!
Cute Life Quotes
Blaming is pointing out there, rather than in here, into your own mind,
when you find yourself in a painful or uncomfortable experience.
Blame means shifting the responsibility for where you are onto someone
or something else, rather than accepting responsibility for your role
in the experience.
To develop a belief in their own personal capability, young people
need a safe climate in which they can explore the consequences
of their choices and behavior
without judgments about success or failure - without blame, shame, or pain.
Jane Nelsen; Lynn Lott, H. Stephen Glenn, Positive Discipline in the Classroom
Blame is fascinating - it shapes our lives. It can be a benign way of
positioning ourselves, a gentle joust or banter, or it can be poisonous,
hurtful or devastating for its victims. It can tear apart marriages and fracture
work relationships; it can disable major social programmes; it can
inflict damage on powerful corporations; it can bring down governments;
it can start wars and justify genocides.
Stephen Fineman, The Blame Business
"However, anger usually involves the externalizing of blame.
When we become angry, we usually consider the source of our
anger to be outside ourselves."
Raymond A. DiGiuseppe, Ph.D.
"If you are looking to inspire people then blaming is the last thing you want to
do. To inspire others, focus your attention on the solution not the blame.
No good comes from blame, good comes from finding a way to correct the
Inspiring Others Quotes
Blame-shifting is a natural human reaction. It happens on the smallest
to the largest scale.
H G Tudor, Your Fault : Blame and the Narcissist
Quote of the Day
... going beyond blame - and by working together to overcome bias -
can we construct more realistic and helpful narratives
that allow us to learn more fully. Going beyond blame enables us to
make our systems more resilient, and build more just and humane
Dave Zwieback, Beyond Blame: Learning From Failure and Success
"Blame-all and Praise-all are two blockheads."
"Wherever you find a problem, you will usually find the finger-pointing
of blame. Society is addicted to playing the victim."
Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
"One of the most significant reasons why many people, especially those
who identify themselves as victims of
something or someone in their childhood, find it difficult to figure out a
solution for an immediate dilemma
is that they don't appreciate the specific effect of their early lives on
their current style of thinking and feeling."
Dr. Laura Schlessinger, Bad Childhood---Good Life
"We live in a culture of blame. People will blame anyone or anything for
their misery sooner than take the responsibility
to own it and make it better."
Dr. Henry Cloud; Dr. John Townsend, It's Not My Fault
"To grow up is to stop putting blame on parents."
Maya Angelou, Becoming Myself
Growing Up Quotes
"The blame game is a waste of time. Any time you're busy fixing blame,
you're wasting energy and not fixing the problem."
So just what is so fascinating about blame avoidance? ... One is that
having become alerted to blame avoidance as a phenomenon,
you start to see it everywhere... blame avoidance is capable of
being discussed at all levels, from abstruse philosophical analysis of the
nature of responsibility to everyday conversations on the bus or in the
bar that swap battle stories about the frustrations of dealing with
big organizations whose systems and structures seem to be carefully
designed to make ordinary human communication with them
as difficult as possible.
Christopher Hood, The Blame Game
"All too often we have been pulled away from being honest with
ourselves and drawn into a game of blaming others for bad situations.
Just how crazy has our society become with playing 'the blame game?'"
Joseph E. McGuire, The Great Blame Game Escape
"Criticism is not a bad thing. It can help you strengthen your marriage,
if it is done correctly.
But, some wives criticize their partners to have a reason to blame
them or to justify their actions.
This type of criticism can affect the confidence and trust of your husband
Franchesca May, Marriage: Guide to been a good wife in the modern era
"When we blame, we give away our power."
"Don't argue for other people's weaknesses. Don't argue for your own.
When you make a mistake, admit it, correct it, and learn from it- immediately."
"All blame is a waste of time.
No matter how much fault you find with another,
and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you.
The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are
looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration.
You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him, but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy."
"Blaming is a dead-end street that doesn't help anyone. But until we risk
telling the truth to ourselves about how we
really feel, nothing in our lives can change or improve."
Christiane Northrup, Mother Daughter Wisdom
"Don't make excuses - make good."
"Whether we like it or not, our lives are a compilation of our experiences.
If we have viewed all that has happened in our lives as being out of our
control, therein lies our first problem. If we blame others for any or everything
that has happened to us and take no responsibility at all, therein lies our
second problem. . . .The first step in turning your life around, in changing
your attitude and in becoming the person you really want to be,
is to first become aware of whom you have become."
Dr. LaSharnda Beckwith, It's Your Life; Own It!: No Blame, No Excuses
Guilt can be an unrelenting source of pain. It keeps us stuck in the past
and prevents us from moving forward.
We might hold a belief that we should feel guilty and condemn
ourselves - not once, but over and over.
Or, guilt may simmer in our unconscious.
Either way, this kind of guilt is insidious and self-destructive and can
sabotage our goals and relationships.
It lowers our self-esteem and makes us easy targets for blame
Darlene Lancer, Freedom from Guilt and Blame: Finding Self-Forgiveness
"When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce.
You look into the reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer,
or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce.
Yet if we have problems with our friends or our family,
we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them,
they will grow well, like lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all,
nor does trying to persuade using reason and arguments.
That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument,
just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand,
you can love, and the situation will change."
Thich Nhat Hanh
"Blaming others is excusing yourself."
The Greatness Guide
"Everyone must take responsibility for themselves.
Blaming your problems on the world will get you nowhere."
Claire Shannon, Gratitude: Feel Grateful Today and Every Day
"It's always easy to blame someone else or outside forces for our actions . . .
Yet we don't have the right to blame other people or circumstances for our
"If you make a bad decision, you need to take responsibility. Keep your head
up, admit fault,
take the blame, and move on. The worst thing you can do is pass blame
on to your team for a poor decision
that you made."
David Miller, Young Boss
"Praise loudly, blame softly."
"The misattribution of blame is one reason we make the same mistakes over
and over again. We learn so little from experience because we often blame
the wrong cause."
Joseph T. Hallinan, Why We Make Mistakes
"We're quick to blame ourselves for lack of progress, but slow to blame
our strategies. Then we repeat them over
and over again, trying to make them work. But here's the thing - if you fail
using a particular strategy more than
a few times, you need to try another one. It doesn't matter if it works for
everyone else if it doesn't work for you!"
Stephen Guise, Mini Habits
"Why do people always blame God for things that go wrong in the world,
and our lives? . . . It just seems that no matter who you are at one point in
your life you will ask that question as if God has something to do with it.
It seems to me that since the day man started to believe in a God man
started to use that God to blame for any misfortune."
Roger Uvyn, Stop Blaming God: He is with you. Listen don't blame.
"As a consequence of what we do wrong or what others do wrong to us,
blame and criticism will be attributed. Sometimes this blame might seem
just but other times it does not. However, no matter how just it might
appear, blame never undoes what is done."
Geof Warren, Not To Blame: Who you become is not who you truly are
"Blameless people are always the most exasperating."
George Eliot Quotes
... welfare rhetoric and policy are less concerned with reforming the
recipients than with reinforcing majoritarian feelings of moral superiority.
This not only makes majoritarian society feel
better but also allows the country to avoid confronting the difficult
structural questions of inequality, poverty, and the suffering of children.
It is more comfortable to blame the victim.
Joel F. Handler, Blame Welfare, Ignore Poverty and Inequality
Who among us can say they have never blamed someone else for
their lack of happiness? For most if not all of us, blame is simply a way of life.
Colin Tipping, Radical Forgiveness